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I’ve addressed the whole ‘denial’ thing before. I find the accusation a lame attempt at somehow discrediting me and/or any other relatively happy adoptees simply for not being miserable, for not adding to their basis for rationalizing that adoption is, in general, a horrible thing because they themselves have had difficulty accepting their own decisions and/or reality. In specific cases of those pulling white rabbit denial cards of out their magician’s hat of adoption angst, I could easily and often lay the whole "displacement" term on them. Some of these people claim that they are optimistic and happy and doing well in life and yet, the majority of what they say is all about discontent, scratching around in the dust looking for grains of misery, even where not much exists. Perhaps they are "displacing" their own "denial" on to me ... and THAT is more than enough dime-store psychology for today.

To each her/his own. I feel fortunate that I do not feel compelled to be this way. It is just not the way I was made ... and that, let’s face it, was a crap shoot. I could have been an angst-y person ... I could have been the perpetually squeaky wheel in search of oil ... I could have found it hard to figure out who I am and why and/or to accept the repercussions of some of my actions or I could have resented the things in my life over which I had no control. Yes, all of that would have been valid, but it just isn’t the way I was made.

I’m ok with negative responses to my perceptions when they are really to what I have written and not to some strange filtered version with little or no resemblance to the ideas I have presented. I welcome sharing thoughts and opinions not just if they jive with mine, but if they are, rather, bouncing to an opposing beat. What has been puzzling me since I began writing this blog is how often people can read what someone has painstakingly written and come out of it with an understanding of the perspectives presented so completely off the mark. Being misattributed after working so hard to make sure I was clear and fair in my efforts puts a bit of a bee in my bonnet!


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