In a ever-so-slight (and not nearly as funny) homage to the David Letterman Top Ten list, I offer you today my Top 10 Reasons Why I Am Happy (or at least not unhappy) I Was Adopted.

Number 10:

A bargain at any price, I was… um, no, not CHEAP, a BARGAIN! This was good leverage, on occasion, when trying to fanangle some pocket money. Upon parental resistance, I might, given the right circumstances, come out with "but A and G [my sisters] cost at least DOUBLE what I did, not to mention the physical pain… what’s 20 bucks after all I saved you in hospital and doctor’s bills, eh?" And, gotta love ‘em, my parents were kind and generous enough to laugh and let me get away with it…well, once.

Number 9:

I have an excuse for why I choose impossible relationships. Clearly, it is because I was adopted and not because I am a sucker for a sob story and am convinced of my Wonder Woman-like ability to fix the most emotionally damaged of men.

Number 8:

I always knew why my parents didn’t ‘get’ me and why I was a freak in general as a teenager. At least that was my story at age thirteen and I was sticking to it!

Number 7:

Being adopted got me this gig writing for Adoption.com.

Number 6:

I am the original ‘ALIAS’ chick, so move over Sydney Bristow. On St. Patrick’s Day, I always wore a "Kiss Me I’m Irish" pin. During the 1976 Olympics, I decided I was Russian/Romanian because I had dark circles under my eyes like the young gymnastics prodigy, Nadia Comanici. And once, on a visit home after being in Africa for two years, a guy working at the sub shop in a bus station accused me of trying to "pass" because it was clear (only) to him that I had African roots. He said I should stop dying my hair blonde (which I don’t) and be proud of my black (though minus the tan a la African sun, I tend to pastey) ... so I took his advice and now, I couldn’t be prouder. Because I didn’t have a more accurate account of my lineage, I could accept his version of me as being as good as any other on offer ... and at least as entertaining. Until next St. Patrick’s Day, that is.



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