Comments on: Talking About Searching for Your Birth Parents http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/talking-about-searching-for-your-birth-p Provides information, resources, and thoughts concerning adoptees and their journey of adoption. Fri, 26 Feb 2010 21:10:30 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: nr63bl80 http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/talking-about-searching-for-your-birth-p/comment-page-1#comment-624 nr63bl80 Wed, 25 Feb 2009 01:34:43 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/09/23/talking-about-searching-for-your-birth-p#comment-624 I personally would say that you do need to do it for you. <br /> My daughter keeps asking me why I do not search for my parents. One reason is I chose not to. The other they chose to give me for adoption and in tuen my parents chose me. They wanted me. I think maybe if I were to search maybe my biological mom had not mentioned me and I would ruin her life. I personally would say that you do need to do it for you.
My daughter keeps asking me why I do not search for my parents. One reason is I chose not to. The other they chose to give me for adoption and in tuen my parents chose me. They wanted me. I think maybe if I were to search maybe my biological mom had not mentioned me and I would ruin her life.

]]> By: utopiaqn http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/talking-about-searching-for-your-birth-p/comment-page-1#comment-623 utopiaqn Sun, 23 Dec 2007 20:44:13 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/09/23/talking-about-searching-for-your-birth-p#comment-623 My adoptive family never held back that I was adopted. They also never held back that my natural mother was deceased. What I had to figure out was that by the time I was about 16, that they had told me atleast 3 different stories of how she died. Car crash, lpane crash etc. It wasnt till they were forced to tell me that my Biological mother had been murdered when I was one year old. I appreciate the fact that they tried to protect me, but I would have found out anyway. They lost me for other reasons totally unrelated to my adoption years later. But I think the fact that I am not there natural child made the thought of never picking up a phone again to call me, much easier. I honestly never felt like Ive really ever had a "real" family anyway. My adoptive family never held back that I was adopted. They also never held back that my natural mother was deceased. What I had to figure out was that by the time I was about 16, that they had told me atleast 3 different stories of how she died. Car crash, lpane crash etc. It wasnt till they were forced to tell me that my Biological mother had been murdered when I was one year old. I appreciate the fact that they tried to protect me, but I would have found out anyway. They lost me for other reasons totally unrelated to my adoption years later. But I think the fact that I am not there natural child made the thought of never picking up a phone again to call me, much easier. I honestly never felt like Ive really ever had a “real” family anyway.

]]> By: Faith Allen http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/talking-about-searching-for-your-birth-p/comment-page-1#comment-622 Faith Allen Mon, 24 Sep 2007 00:30:22 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/09/23/talking-about-searching-for-your-birth-p#comment-622 GREAT advice, Abby!!<br /> <br /> I agree that it is important to analyze your expectations before searching. Also, I agree with all that you said about adoptive parents. I, personally, want to be there for my son if/when he chooses to search. If things go well, I want to give his birth family a big hug and thank you. If things go poorly, I want to be there to comfort my son.<br /> <br /> Take care,<br /> <br /> - Faith GREAT advice, Abby!!

I agree that it is important to analyze your expectations before searching. Also, I agree with all that you said about adoptive parents. I, personally, want to be there for my son if/when he chooses to search. If things go well, I want to give his birth family a big hug and thank you. If things go poorly, I want to be there to comfort my son.

Take care,

- Faith

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