We all have our own way to work through difficult things that happen in our lives. The way I have found that works best for me is that I have my little box that I lock things away when they become too much to deal with at that time in my life. This allows me not to be consumed with issues while dealing with them in my own time and place.

When some things seem unbearable or suffocating, then I know that I have to take a step back and lock it away in my little box to face another day. No, this does not make things disappear nor do I believe that. It does allow me time to cope and work through it. It can be a way to allow you time to accept the pain or grief of your issues when it becomes too painful to deal with at that moment.

There seems to be such a pressure to deal with issues head on and quickly when that is not what is best every person. While you must find a way to face the issues, you also have to understand and accept that we do that in very different ways. There is no right or wrong way to work through your issues also long as you are making progress.

This is a way a lot of foster children learn to cope with their lives and the abuse they have endured. It deals with the pain of their issues when they have shut it out and deal with things in small amounts allowing themselves time to cope with their pain instead of it engulfing them.

As I go into this holiday season I know that I will be opening and closing my little box while coping with the loss of my adoptive mom and my brother. My little box allows me to be the mother, daughter, sister, wife and friend that I am while coming to terms in my life with my losses.