Comments on: Adoption is not Doom and Gloom http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom Provides information, resources, and thoughts concerning adoptees and their journey of adoption. Tue, 17 Nov 2009 00:38:41 -0700 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.8.4 hourly 1 By: stellasolomns http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom/comment-page-1#comment-172 stellasolomns Fri, 07 Aug 2009 02:34:03 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/11/30/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom#comment-172 We may be writing to those in the know here, but anyway, please see the link ><br /> <br /> http://about-orphans.blogspot.com We may be writing to those in the know here, but anyway, please see the link >

http://about-orphans.blogspot.com

]]> By: dawn89 http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom/comment-page-1#comment-171 dawn89 Sat, 28 Mar 2009 05:05:14 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/11/30/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom#comment-171 this is the first time i am on a site like this...i never really talk about my whole problem cus no one i now is going threw...........<br /> my mother was 19 when she had me and 21 when she had my brother.. i live with my brother but he is in denial and hates them....i want to find my parents so bad... i was adopted in west plam beach and i also have an other brother that i dont know... my dads name is charles scanlan... my mother and father were in and out of jail... when cps found me and my dad i was 18 months and i lived under a bridge..i was so under weight i could not hold my head up... my adoptive father said that if they found me a week later i would of died....i was also a crack baby...i have a great aunt name elizabeth west....even though all the crap they put me though i want to meet them and for them to be apart of my life...i am about to be on the florida adoption registery in a few weeks they said.... they also told me i have to wait a year to get any non identify info.... i do know my mother is 36 or 37.... can anyone help me or give me advice i really need any help i can get......<br /> thank for listening this is the first time i am on a site like this…i never really talk about my whole problem cus no one i now is going threw………..
my mother was 19 when she had me and 21 when she had my brother.. i live with my brother but he is in denial and hates them….i want to find my parents so bad… i was adopted in west plam beach and i also have an other brother that i dont know… my dads name is charles scanlan… my mother and father were in and out of jail… when cps found me and my dad i was 18 months and i lived under a bridge..i was so under weight i could not hold my head up… my adoptive father said that if they found me a week later i would of died….i was also a crack baby…i have a great aunt name elizabeth west….even though all the crap they put me though i want to meet them and for them to be apart of my life…i am about to be on the florida adoption registery in a few weeks they said…. they also told me i have to wait a year to get any non identify info…. i do know my mother is 36 or 37…. can anyone help me or give me advice i really need any help i can get……
thank for listening

]]> By: nr63bl80 http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom/comment-page-1#comment-170 nr63bl80 Wed, 25 Feb 2009 01:23:57 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/11/30/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom#comment-170 deanie I was wondering the damething. I really do not need to find my parents. I do at times want to fin siblings. I know one sibling was older than me and my father had chilfren with his wife. That is all I know. They are from the Rantoul Champaign area. deanie I was wondering the damething. I really do not need to find my parents. I do at times want to fin siblings. I know one sibling was older than me and my father had chilfren with his wife. That is all I know. They are from the Rantoul Champaign area.

]]> By: nr63bl80 http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom/comment-page-1#comment-169 nr63bl80 Wed, 25 Feb 2009 01:20:22 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/11/30/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom#comment-169 I was adopted at 3 weeks old. I have not known any parents other than the ones who chose me. I do not say I was given up. I prefer to say that I was chosen. Although I know if anything happens to my parents I will be alone, I have no brothers or sisters, none that I have met or know anyway. My daughter and granddaughter are all that I have. That is the only downfall I have. I love my parents, they have been better to me than many parents are to their own flesh and blood. My other family members well they say they accept me but deep down I know different. I was adopted at 3 weeks old. I have not known any parents other than the ones who chose me. I do not say I was given up. I prefer to say that I was chosen. Although I know if anything happens to my parents I will be alone, I have no brothers or sisters, none that I have met or know anyway. My daughter and granddaughter are all that I have. That is the only downfall I have. I love my parents, they have been better to me than many parents are to their own flesh and blood. My other family members well they say they accept me but deep down I know different.

]]> By: aysheab http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom/comment-page-1#comment-168 aysheab Thu, 19 Feb 2009 03:21:14 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/11/30/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom#comment-168 Hi all,<br /> This is the first adoption type site that I have ever been on and actually written something.<br /> I am 32 years old and from the UK. At the age of 2 I was placed with foster parents. The same foster parents adopted me several years later. Sadly,they were both dead by the time I was 13. I spent the rest of my childhood in the care of my local authority in the North of England. I eventually moved to the South where I now live and work. I have a very successful career and have many, many friends and a really understanding partner.<br /> One year ago my natural mother decided she wanted to spark up a relationship. I had met her briefly when I was 16 so she didn't find it too difficult to track me down. I was really pleased at first and felt as though the 'void' that so many of you above refer to had finally been plugged. However, one year on and that hole or void, it is back with all that I never anticipated I would feel again-and worse.<br /> I always promised myself (having lost two adopted parents) that if i were lucky enough to ever gain a relationship with my natural mother I would treasure her no matter what.<br /> I never blamed her for my adoption and have always understood her situation. However, although she's a decent, loving woman I just cannot stand an emotional connection with her. I do not want her to get too close to me and although this probably started out as a concious decision borne of self protection I cannot open up to her. She hasn't given up on me yet. Infact, the more I push her away the more she seems to make the point to me that she is not going to leave or reject me since I told her when we first met that I was worried about this.<br /> I'm polite, civil, giving (to an extent) and very open with her.<br /> My feeling is that after taking all these years to reestablish my identity its now all up in the air again. Having to adjust again to the relationship is not as easy as you may imagine and in a way I wish she had of just left me to get on with my life. It sounds selfish I know. Like I said, I was on cloud 9 for a few months. But, and I don't know if this will strike a chord with anyone out there- this switch inside of me that springs into life when someone gets too close or things are going too well flicked on.<br /> My heart breaks for those of you who are looking for your natural parents-especially those of you who have lost adopted parents I know exactly how that feels. However, my point in the above is that sometimes it isn't how you want it to be in the end. I want to let my mum into my heart and I swear I really do. I couldn't really ask much more of her because she is trying harder than maybe I deserve. <br /> So, although finding a parent may be initially overwhelming, all those feelings that every adoptee has somewhere do not disappear. Infact, they are magnified by a thousand times. Your future meets your past if that makes any sense. <br /> If you are preparing to meet a parent then I really suggest that you take things really slowly to start with as you will feel some things you could not have anticipated. It is actually hard work and one must be prepared to be honest with onself in dealing with the issues that will arise. Hi all,
This is the first adoption type site that I have ever been on and actually written something.
I am 32 years old and from the UK. At the age of 2 I was placed with foster parents. The same foster parents adopted me several years later. Sadly,they were both dead by the time I was 13. I spent the rest of my childhood in the care of my local authority in the North of England. I eventually moved to the South where I now live and work. I have a very successful career and have many, many friends and a really understanding partner.
One year ago my natural mother decided she wanted to spark up a relationship. I had met her briefly when I was 16 so she didn’t find it too difficult to track me down. I was really pleased at first and felt as though the ‘void’ that so many of you above refer to had finally been plugged. However, one year on and that hole or void, it is back with all that I never anticipated I would feel again-and worse.
I always promised myself (having lost two adopted parents) that if i were lucky enough to ever gain a relationship with my natural mother I would treasure her no matter what.
I never blamed her for my adoption and have always understood her situation. However, although she’s a decent, loving woman I just cannot stand an emotional connection with her. I do not want her to get too close to me and although this probably started out as a concious decision borne of self protection I cannot open up to her. She hasn’t given up on me yet. Infact, the more I push her away the more she seems to make the point to me that she is not going to leave or reject me since I told her when we first met that I was worried about this.
I’m polite, civil, giving (to an extent) and very open with her.
My feeling is that after taking all these years to reestablish my identity its now all up in the air again. Having to adjust again to the relationship is not as easy as you may imagine and in a way I wish she had of just left me to get on with my life. It sounds selfish I know. Like I said, I was on cloud 9 for a few months. But, and I don’t know if this will strike a chord with anyone out there- this switch inside of me that springs into life when someone gets too close or things are going too well flicked on.
My heart breaks for those of you who are looking for your natural parents-especially those of you who have lost adopted parents I know exactly how that feels. However, my point in the above is that sometimes it isn’t how you want it to be in the end. I want to let my mum into my heart and I swear I really do. I couldn’t really ask much more of her because she is trying harder than maybe I deserve.
So, although finding a parent may be initially overwhelming, all those feelings that every adoptee has somewhere do not disappear. Infact, they are magnified by a thousand times. Your future meets your past if that makes any sense.
If you are preparing to meet a parent then I really suggest that you take things really slowly to start with as you will feel some things you could not have anticipated. It is actually hard work and one must be prepared to be honest with onself in dealing with the issues that will arise.

]]> By: eric42462 http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom/comment-page-1#comment-167 eric42462 Mon, 02 Feb 2009 08:22:26 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/11/30/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom#comment-167 Male Born 1/24/60 In Boise At St. Alphonsus Hospital.. <br /> Birth name Timothy Scott Smith <br /> and<br /> <br /> Male Born 1/26/61 In Boise At St. Alphonsus Hospital ..<br /> Birth name: Patrick William Smith<br /> <br /> Placed up for Adoption <br /> <br /> Birth Family wants to find you Male Born 1/24/60 In Boise At St. Alphonsus Hospital..
Birth name Timothy Scott Smith
and

Male Born 1/26/61 In Boise At St. Alphonsus Hospital ..
Birth name: Patrick William Smith

Placed up for Adoption

Birth Family wants to find you

]]> By: deanie http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom/comment-page-1#comment-166 deanie Mon, 05 Jan 2009 02:47:26 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/11/30/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom#comment-166 DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY INFORMATION ON HOW O FIND AN ADOPTED SIBLING? I HAVE TWO BIOLOGICAL SISTRS ONE WAS GIVEN UP FOR ADOPTION AND THE OTHER WAS RAISED BY MY GRANDMOTHER. I DO KNOW THEIR NAMES OR BIRTHDATES ANY SUGGESTIONS? DOES ANYONE HAVE ANY INFORMATION ON HOW O FIND AN ADOPTED SIBLING? I HAVE TWO BIOLOGICAL SISTRS ONE WAS GIVEN UP FOR ADOPTION AND THE OTHER WAS RAISED BY MY GRANDMOTHER. I DO KNOW THEIR NAMES OR BIRTHDATES ANY SUGGESTIONS?

]]> By: deanie http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom/comment-page-1#comment-165 deanie Mon, 05 Jan 2009 02:43:21 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/11/30/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom#comment-165 to teacher 102 I DON'T THINK YOU EVER FILL THAT VOID I AM 44 YEARS OLD AND WAS GIVEN UP AT BIRTH. I WAS ADOPTED AT AGE 6 MY ADOPTIVE PARENTS HAVE PASSED NOW AND I AM REALLY FEELING A LOSS. MY MOM PASSED TWO YEARS AGO I AM STILL SAD AND LONELY. I HAVE JUST REALIZED I AM JUST GOING TO HAVE TO LIVE WITH IT AND MAKE THE BEST OF IT. to teacher 102 I DON’T THINK YOU EVER FILL THAT VOID I AM 44 YEARS OLD AND WAS GIVEN UP AT BIRTH. I WAS ADOPTED AT AGE 6 MY ADOPTIVE PARENTS HAVE PASSED NOW AND I AM REALLY FEELING A LOSS. MY MOM PASSED TWO YEARS AGO I AM STILL SAD AND LONELY. I HAVE JUST REALIZED I AM JUST GOING TO HAVE TO LIVE WITH IT AND MAKE THE BEST OF IT.

]]> By: lynjac http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom/comment-page-1#comment-164 lynjac Mon, 29 Dec 2008 15:06:35 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/11/30/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom#comment-164 I am also an adoptee and just like a lot of other adoptees I have had an amazing life. My parents still love and support me with everything I do in life.<br /> <br /> I do wish to make contact and just have some questions answered. There is a lot I think about and I now of only one person I can ask those questions to. I don't feel that making contact would change the way I feel about my parents, if anything it will make the bond even so much stronger. I am also an adoptee and just like a lot of other adoptees I have had an amazing life. My parents still love and support me with everything I do in life.

I do wish to make contact and just have some questions answered. There is a lot I think about and I now of only one person I can ask those questions to. I don’t feel that making contact would change the way I feel about my parents, if anything it will make the bond even so much stronger.

]]> By: pcata8888 http://adoptee.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom/comment-page-1#comment-163 pcata8888 Thu, 11 Dec 2008 17:32:20 +0000 http://adoptee.www.adoptionblogs.com/2007/11/30/adoption-is-not-doom-and-gloom#comment-163 I have never truly discussed being given up for adoption. I think, right there, the "given up" part, is hard for all adoptees. But, my family is just like every other, in that we all have our issues. No family is perfect. I had a great childhood with the knowledge and celebration of being adopted. My Mom made the day we met a very special occasion every year. Like a second birthday. I have never truly discussed being given up for adoption. I think, right there, the “given up” part, is hard for all adoptees. But, my family is just like every other, in that we all have our issues. No family is perfect. I had a great childhood with the knowledge and celebration of being adopted. My Mom made the day we met a very special occasion every year. Like a second birthday.

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