A 13 year old adoptee, Kia, returned to her birth country, China, for a visit. She was 2 years old the last time she was in China. She did not have many memories to recall since she was adopted at a young age. The only thing she talked about from China was a rainbow bird. Her adoptive parents made arrangements for their visit to China along with the agency they used for the adoption.

The agency gives adoptive families the opportunity to travel together to their children’s birth country. The adoptive families are responsible for their own expenses. Traveling with other adoptive families makes them not feel like tourists... more

Poverty is an aspect of adoption that some people do not want to face. It is a large factor in adoption throughout the world. Some people think it should not be part of adoption without addressing the problem that so many families struggle with.

Even in the United States, poverty is a part of the adoption scene. Look at our foster care system. It is full for children that have lived with poverty, neglect, and abuse. We have resources to help people find their way out of poverty if they choose to in this country.

Other countries do not have the resources to assist families, leaving children vulnerable. The poverty that other countries face we cannot even begin to imagine.... more

Sometimes, the media and others paint adoptees as having major issues from psychological needs, consumed with anger, depression, etc. Yes, some adoptees may have dealt with these issues from time to time, but for the most part, their lives are not controlled by these things. There are a few adoptees that are unable to move beyond these issues, that I do understand.

In every walk of life, there are people struggling with issues, but that does not mean that everyone in that walk of life is also struggling. It is funny, sometimes it is like everyone else expects adoptees to be angry and even have issues with being adopted.

This leads one to wonder why others want, expect,... more

I have been asked how to respond when people or even children ask questions about an adoptee’s adoption information. Believe me, people can ask questions that some of us would never imagine asking of a stranger or acquaintance. A lot of the time it is done in front of the adoptee.

To be honest, it would depend on the question and what kind of personality you have. Some people are comfortable saying that it is none of your business while others could not do that in a million years. For me it depends on what kind of mood I am in on that day, and if the people are just trying to be nosy.

When my mom was questioned about why my birth mother gave me up for adoption, she explained... more

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I did talk with my doctor (one I have been with for years) about what we were told. To my surprise she stated that she already thought my daughter was mixed for the entire year she had been treating her. I responded, “Why didn’t you say anything to me?” She responded, “ I did not think it mattered to you.” I said, “It does not matter. I would have liked you to share this with me instead of being the last to know. It seems so crazy I never thought of it. How do I begin to think about explaining this to her one day?” My doctor said the most helpful and amazing thing to me.... more

Reality is that a lot of adoptees will grow up in transracial homes, different ethic siblings, or themselves being a mixed race. I have been educating myself concerning adoptees facing these challenges. There will be things that come up occasional (maybe a lot) concerning differences in a transracial family.

Some adoptive parents know from the “get go” that they want to adopt children of another race, while others are open to the idea and then there are a few of us that stumbles into it or it just works out that way.

I was one of the stumbling ones. I never thought of race when I looked at one of my toddlers that I adopted. We were blessed to foster a baby girl that we... more

There is good and bad in everything in life. When an adoptive parent turns out to not be a great or even a bad parent or an adoption has negative outcomes it seems to lead many people's thoughts and opinions to adoption is negative in general. Some people believe that there are only a selected few adoptees that feel positive towards adoption. That is not necessarily the case.

Granted there are some not so great and even terrible adoptive parents but also there are a huge number of biological parents that also have major problems. The huge differences are that we do not call for doing away with parenting but adoptive parenting is fair game. There is not anything in this world that... more

Our science is now leading adoptees down a different road with some new twist and turns along the way. These adoptees are coming of age choosing to search for their beginnings. These are the first adoptees to make their way or deal with complex beginnings. These are adoptees are conceived from donated eggs or/and sperm.

Donated eggs produced a set of twin girls to the mother Carrie that carried them. The egg donor or as the twin girls call her “Egg Mom” was a strapped grad student that turned into a college teacher. They exchanged notes and gifts through the clinic anonymously.... more

We must realize that adoption is not a clearly painted picture. The reality is that there are several different pictures of adoption and the issues or reasons are not always cut and dry. One major thing is that some people do not stop and realize what kind of lives some adoptees would have faced without being adopted.

Yes, I do understand the some birth mothers have given up a child and then get to a point that they could have parented the child. There are also birth mothers that do not fit into that category. It could be because of their choices in life or things that are beyond their control.

There are older children, sibling groups and children... more

Is the amount of monies involved in adoption a concern? Yes, without a doubt. The monies concerns involve all members in the adoption arena. No one should be making large profits on a child or baby needing a family.

An adoptee friend’s birth mother had her college paid for by the adoptive parents. To my friend she felt like her birth mother gave her away for a college education. The adoptive parents did not do this in a bad way. They had money and wanted to help the birth mother of the child to have a better life.

The government controlling and handling all adoption concerns me for several reasons. Let’s look at our foster care system. It is in shambles, plagued with... more