Once contact has been made with your birth parents a honeymoon period will begin just as do most beginning relationships. It is very easy to get caught up in the euphoria of the experiences of connecting to your past and birth family. The honeymoon period is about joy, happiness, and love, to different degrees. A honeymoon period is not a bad thing at all. It is about preparing ourselves for what comes next. Some honeymoon periods may be short while others are long.

We want to be accepted for the person that we have grown into but we also have a part of... more

While children are conceived with donated embryos, sperm or eggs, without knowing their history and their birth families hmm….I guess their proper title would be biological families since they were not involved in the birth. These children do not grow up as adoptees since there was not a legal adoption. They do still deal with some of the same issues and feelings that adoptees face.

These children do not have their medical history, biological connection, and knowledge of their beginnings just like adoptees. I would venture to guess that some of these... more

There seems to be a misconception that adoptees should feel the same way along with having the same issues. This is totally an unrealistic view of adoptees just as it is with any other individuals. I understand that there are adoptees that are dealing with a great deal of pain, major issues and feelings concerning being adopted. I have never minimized these adoptees feelings or issues. After saying that, let me also say that not all adoptees fall in that category.

While I do relate to a lot of other adoptees’ feelings or issues I do not agree with every... more

A young mother has given her second daughter up for adoption after her first daughter was placed into care. This mother wanted to a better life for her daughters. She did not want her daughters ending up living a life as she had to.

The young mother began her life in foster care at the young age of five years old. Her life was... more

I read a question concerning adopting the other day addressed to Dr. Joyce Brothers. A mother of a 3 year old was concerned that their daughter was an only child, and the mother cannot have any more children. The couple was thinking of adopting a playmate (their words, not mine) for their daughter. The mom stated they loved their daughter so much that they would be willing to adopt a permanent playmate for her (yes, this was their words).

This got me to thinking about adoptees that... more

When I hear about, or become involved with an adoptive situation where everything revolves around adoption, it bothers me. I guess mainly because I’m an adoptee. I have been around young adoptees and adoptive families were the conversations always seemed to revolve around adoption. There has to be a balance of life, childhood and adoption.

I am not trying to be like everyone else (meaning people not adopted) or not act like I am not adopted in anyway. Adoption is part of my life (a big part) but it is not who I am, nor does it define me or where my life... more

Adoption and the Life Effect to Adoptees

Adoption does impact every part of an adoptees’ life, which I totally believe and understand. That does not mean adoption is the magnet for all that goes wrong in life. There are plenty of people that have the same issues and problems that adoptees have. What is the reason for their problems?

I find it so strange when people relate things that happen in my life to being adopted when I do not see it that way... more

When looking into the mirror one day you do not recognize the person you are looking at. Some adoptees begin talking about feelings of not knowing who they are, lost and disconnected, etc. Personally I think society looks for reasons to place blame when things do not go as planned. I am always amazed to hear all the things adoption is blamed for. When the truth is that other (meaning not adoptees) people have the same issues, struggles or challenges that adoptees face.

This makes you stop and think could this just be a part of life and does not necessarily have... more

Some adoptees do not feel the need to reconnect, search or develop a relationship with their birth parents. Granted there are more adoptees that do want contact with their birth parents but there are a few that do not have this desire for whatever reason. Yes, this can seem very strange to different members of the adoption triad.

Adoptees that are content with their lives and do not have the desire for contact with their birth parents should not be made to feel pushed aside. It is very easy to portray to these adoptees that there is a problem with them... more

A wedding day is a very important occasion which will include a lot of memories one day. This is no different for adoptees, except maybe a few more wishful thoughts about this special day.

A young adoptee bride lost her mother at the young age of 8 years old to breast cancer. Her father went on to remarry and after some time her step mother adopted the girl and her brother. The adoptive mother picked up the pieces and became the mother that these... more