Something I continue to hear that is a major problem in adoption is money surrounding adoption and the cost of it. Which I do agree that there needs to be a cap of cost of the things surrounding adoption but when I hear statements like; “Money has to be removed from adoption to remove the corruption. That adoption is a business of profit, etc.” this is part of the problem. I do agree with these statements to a point but you also have to look at the realistic picture of the situation for everyone involved (yes, even the businesses).

The truth is that money will always be involved... more

Can Adoption Reform Happen with Everyone on Different Sides?

The truth is that reform will not happen in adoption until the people involved in adoption put their insecurities, pain, and other issues with adoption and the others aside. This is the way to get to a common goal of reform in adoption. We cannot expect the public to take our desires to see adoption reform seriously when it seems like we are all caught up in ourselves, point fingers at each other, etc.

While... more

There is always ongoing talk of the much needed adoption reform which I do agree that there needs to be some changes. But how can reform begin when people involved in adoption cannot even work together. To see the big overall pictures seems impossible at times for a lot people involved in adoption.

When I started here I learned that there were sides, a line in the sand that divided the adoption community. I was quickly placed on the side of the adoptive parents I guess because I could understand most of their issues. I now realize that what divides people involved with adoption is much bigger than a line in the sand more like huge ravine that seems to grow wider and deeper every... more

I have not had much experience or knowledge of open adoption before I had started writing here. In my mind open adoption was when adoptive parents and birth families had full contact. In time I have learned that there are drastic degrees of openness. Knowing any information and keeping a connection for the adoptee through open adoption can be a benefit to adoptee. This I totally understand and can see the need for the openness.

There will come a time when the adoptee starts to ask questions about the... more

Being involved with adoptionblogs.com blogging has been a tremendous learning experience for me. I have been enlightened with other people’s adoption journeys, struggles, beliefs, and everything that comes with adoption. Who would have guessed I would have learned some much by sharing my thoughts, experiences and insight.

Looking within my self and addressing my adoption journey and the issues I have faced along the way has been a great benefit to me. When you’re adopted, it is just that, you do not always stop and think about... more

The image of adoption being second best in so many ways is a reality. I cannot tell you how many times I have heard this personally or in a conversation concerning adoption; someone says after finding a person is adopted or parenting through adoption says, “So, you couldn’t have children of your own (makes some reference to fertility issues). A reader left a comment on one of my posts referencing to this every thing. Not all adoptive parents adopt because they cannot have children of their own. While couples do look at different options when they learn they are unable to have... more

Unethical Adoption

In life we all have choices and different paths to take in life. It is up to us on which paths we choose and the choices we make in our lives. With our choices there are good and bad outcomes.

We all make choices we regret or second guess after the fact that we have made them. When I was pregnant with my daughter I was having a difficult pregnancy and moved closer to family. I found a doctor that was close to my home. I’ve never been too much of a doctor person, but thought... more

This is in reply to comments left here. When a person goes to an unethical doctor and receives crappy care, or when an insurance company is unethical by taking a month’s payment to provide insurance but at every turn they are denying to pay, do we call for all doctors to stop practicing medicine or that all insurance is stopped. Hmmm….how about a school that treats special needs children unethically with the idea that some children do not deserve an education or punish them because they have a disability (which... more

While I do recognize and understand that there is some coercion involved with adoption even now-a-days, I do not believe it is to the point some people would like the public to believe. Sure there are unethical people involved in adoption but there are unethical people involved in every aspect of our lives from doctors, schools (this one is a huge one), politicians, police, legal services, religion, and even when you purchase things, you can find fraud. Truthfully, I do not know of anything that does not have unethical practices involved somewhere. This is in response to a comment... more

While I have repeatedly stated in the past that I acknowledge and understand that there are some adoptees that are completely against adoption. I am screaming now, “I totally understand that a few adoptees have major issues with adoption or being adopted.” Now, that it is said again, I will respond to a detailed comment against adoption and adoptive parents.

There was a time when young pregnant girls were sent away to have their babies in secret to not bring shame on the families. The girl’s family,... more