At times it seems like adoption is all doom and gloom for a whole number of reasons. You will have gloom in adoption just as everything else in this life. But gloom does not fill adoption as some would like others to believe. There are plenty of adoptees that have lived a happy and fulfilled life even with being adopted.

While there are a few adoptees that are scarred, wounded through adoption, this is not the case for most adoptees. Granted it is easy to wonder what kind of impact adoption will have on an adoptee when there seems to be so much negativity concerning... more

Adoption can mean so many things to different people. It also brings a lot of different emotions out in people. It is very personal to me because it is the foundation of my being. While it does not define who I am, it is a part of me. Adoption to me is life. It was the greatest gift that I have ever received. My birth mother gave me the opportunity of a future she could not provide for me at that point in her life.

I was blessed to be adopted with my sister and grow up together. Adoption provided me a normal childhood with all the experiences to go along with it too.... more

This month has gone by so fast heck…even this year has flown by. Oh, what a year it has been for me. I was given this great opportunity to blog here as an adoptee and I have enjoyed my time. I have met some great people and learned so much from bloggers and readers. The time has come for me to begin another path in my adoption journey of life. This will be my last month sharing my experiences, thoughts, feelings and information as being an adoptee.

A lot of you have been supportive through some very different times in my life or when facing some unpleasant issues that I am... more

The most hurtful thing that brought home the feeling of second best, or really not even being that, was when I saw a copy of my family tree that other family members had done. I get to the page that my personal family information was on, and there is my name and my sister’s name with the words “adopted” beside them. This happened when I was maybe early twenties (yes, I know it was a long time ago) but still to this day it really brothers me.

I was completely shocked to see that I was not viewed as a member of the family or a person but as “adopted”. That day I learned that... more

Understanding why things happen in this life is not always easy. I shared my experience of visiting my brother’s grave but was unable to go into great detail because it was so emotional at that point. My oldest daughter went with me but sat in the car while I took this part of my adoption journey alone. It is something that I had to face alone not knowing how I would feel or react facing the reality of life or the end of it.

After some personal time I did ask my daughter if she would like to see my brother’s grave. She asked if he would have been her uncle. And I said yes but somewhat different since we... more

Some people believe parenting is for a lifetime while others believe it is until they turn 18 year old or become independent. When I hear a parent saying, “I cannot wait until she moves out and my job is done.” I always question statements like these when I hear parents make them. Honestly this is a pet peeve of mine. I thought being a parent was a lifetime commitment not just for a few years.

While I do know that some parents think that when the child (as an adult) moves out that is when their parenting responsibility stops. I think we all need our parents which also includes parenting from time to time at any age. Heck…I am getting close to my forties and I need my parents... more

In the past, twins being separated through adoption were something that did happen without thinking about the effect on the twins over the long term. Adoptive parents in most cases did not realize they were adopting a twin and the other twin was being adopted by another family. I wonder how many families would have adopted twins if they had the knowledge that it was even a possibility. How many siblings were separated from their twin because of the adoption agency’s choice? Was it only to allow more couples the chance of parenting through adoption?

An adoptee went in search of her birth mother to find she had... more

We all have our own way to work through difficult things that happen in our lives. The way I have found that works best for me is that I have my little box that I lock things away when they become too much to deal with at that time in my life. This allows me not to be consumed with issues while dealing with them in my own time and place.

When some things seem unbearable or suffocating, then I know that I have to take a step back and lock it away in my little box to face another day. No, this does not make things disappear nor do I believe that. It does allow me time to cope... more

Have you been thinking of searching for your birth mother or maybe you have run into a wall this may be the opportunity for you. ABC’s Wife Swap is hoping to do an episode that would reunite a birth mother and female adoptee. The show would search for your birth mother and both parties would have to agree with the meeting, while participating in the episode.

If you not familiar with the show, two wives switch houses and families for a week. Most families live very different lives and different areas which makes things... more

Anytime you have a loss or go through some sort of grief it takes time to move beyond it or find some peace. The journey of working through your grief will be completely unique to each person. Allowing yourself the time to work through your feelings is very important. Something that may work for one person may not work for you.

We all have to find our own way in working through our grief. Yes, it does take work to get beyond it or find some peace. It can become easy to sit and let your grief consume you while taking over your life. As I have been dealing with things with... more